Case of the Ex: I know you just want “Exposure”

I’ve had the pain of experiencing losing a friend. I say friend because we were indeed still friends at a previous status quo.

No issues. No strings attached and no adverse comments whatsoever. Till a photo was posted of me and his close friend.

Reading time: 5m 45s

I was being discriminated by this person because he was very disturbed with me still being friends with his circle of friends.

And I was accused as wanting to gain “Exposure”.

The person privately messaged , “ Stop hovering around my friends, I know you just want exposure.” And all because I gave a gift to his friend who recently gave birth.

I was appalled, just like this person was when that word was used on me. I never expected this from him and had much respect for this person before this incident. So this was a game changer.

This was how he burned the bridge.

To begin with, I believed it to be a sheer misunderstanding of my intent but even after explaining my intent, there was no apologies or clearing up of this disagreement whatsoever.

So I left it as it was, we agree to disagree and carried on with our merry lives.

So here’s how it went. This person’s friend posted a photo of us and tagged me in it, in the form of a thank you for the gifts I had given.

I was merely visiting an old acquaintance as we do still keep in touch the last five years. So we do it in the small ways that we do.

Through comments and LIKEs and just connecting via random posts. So this day, I decide to come and visit.

Pretty normal, nothing wrong with that. That’s how people show their love. They do it virtually or for some people, I also physically come and visit them.

But the uncalled for repercussions after that visit was indeed appalling. (As you can see, I’m emphasizing this word as this word was used on me, “I’m appalled.” in his words, which gave me quite a shock cos no one ever used this word to my face.)

I was stamped as someone who only wanted to be friends with his friends to gain “Exposure.” Which till this day, this person has not given me an explanation of what exactly that means. This person basically has put a “This is my property” sign on his friends.

Though this is over and I look at this person extremely different now, there’s a lesson to learn from this experience.

This article is meant to create an awareness and a sort of mindfulness in what we perceive about other people’s intentions. It is a sneak peek into the real lives of Content Creators.

First of all, it’s not right to lump-sum every social media person you see out there as a social butterfly or Social Media Influencer.

It’s not a fair judgement and definitely a wrong way of deducting what each person in Social Media’s intention is, just because they’re on social media more than you.

A lot of people use social media as a platform. Yes, some to gain fame and fortune. While others, need a place to speak their mind. Journals are also online now, in the version of blogs or vlogs. To create awareness or to run a campaign. There is no choice but to connect with the public, with the World. The internet sprouted out many possibilities by giving birth to all these different types of platforms. Instagram, Facebook, Tik Tok, MySpace and Spotify just to name a few.

It’s connection to the next level.

“Good behavior isn’t perpetuity, I do believe in the modern Internet to create awareness for something you want, whether it’s to raise money for a non profit or to sell glasses, I believe the volume of content is….because then you’re able to contextualize it to your audience , it’s absolutely the leverage of the current state of consumer consumption…. I’m surprised at the sheer level of quick judgements that our society has become comfortable with… I don’t care abut social media, I care about humans communicating with each other.”

– Gary Vee.

That last sentence resonates with me most because people confuse what Content Creators do. The True message of their content, versus who they privately are can be the same or totally different depending on what their intent is and who that person really is.

I personally, care about connection. I care about networking with the right people and producing content for whatever sets of reasons. But when it comes to friendship, it’s for real. It’s deep down inside, from the bottom of my Heart.

To use such precious time on people you don’t really love and care about will be wasteful. That’s why I feel it’s important to spend quality time or even show some love whenever you can, even if you’re just dropping by. Giving a gift. Saying hello. Taking a look if they’re ok or not. Trying to cheer them up.

That’s just what you do for friends. It’s not some pursuit to gain popularity or “exposure” as how I was blatantly accused of.

The life of Content Creators is hectic. Time is of an essence and we have no choice but to plan out our schedules.

Cos most of us in the creative community are out there with intent and purpose; we want to drive a message, we want to provoke thought, we want to inspire, promote positivity, engage in meaningful conversations, have a good laugh at ourselves but also to create awareness.

We share and recommend. We inform and we introspect and aren’t shy to be an open book to whoever is willing to listen.

On a personal note, I value every reader and follower of my feed. Through you, I discover new content, I’m inspired by your stories and also I get to know how my friends are doing.

The “LM” on social media is someone who communicates with others by rolling out collective information about love and life. I am more organized and display a cleaner outlay for my public feed. This is only for aesthetic purposes. But I’m still the same person minus the outbursts of rants once in a while.

“LM” also reminds, recommends and shares other people’s experiences when given the permission to. I have a more structured feel to my feed.

The “LM” behind closed doors on the private side is a little bit messy and random, my personal friends get to see that messy side as they love and accept me by whatever circumstances.

It’s still “LM” just that I don’t post that often and I share different types of content. Whatever that comes to mind. It’s not structured, it’s just random, that’s what I meant by “messy” earlier.

So to sum it up, most Content Creators create content because they love sharing their passions in the form of their daily vlogs and photos on IG. Some do it for work and some do it for a greater cause.

Some Content Creators share their skill set on whatever they’re passionate about. It could be as simple as make-up or campaigning a cause or a lifestyle.

I create content to share a type of lifestyle. About the simple life, lifestyle.

It’s about how to detach yourself from things that are negative and how to value and lead a simpler life.

The Simple Life content is holistic. It’s about love, life , being human and surviving in this hectic dog-eat-dog world.

It’s about finances, about how to gain peace, life hack through a midlife crisis. Things of that sort.

It’s life experiences compiled in a digest. Simple to read and easy to absorb in hopes that you could learn a thing or two from our mistakes or through the experiences of others.

So if you follow or know a friend who’s a Content Creator, take a step back.

Know what they’re passionate about and then make your judgement based on what you actually know.

If not, you’re on your way to losing friends who actually care about you. They’re not using you or anyone for “Exposure.” And you should be mature enough to recognize the difference.

If you have to assume, assume the best of intentions.

Live simply.

Assume the best until proven otherwise.


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